Chicken Soup for the Size 13 Sole: Letters from the Editor 006

I’m just going to come right out and say it: there is a conspiracy in the sneaker world against people who wear size 13 shoes. I’m flat-out tired of denying it, or blaming myself for not being quick enough on the draw or rich enough to pay the exorbitant premiums on the secondary market. It’s enough.

Size 13 sneaker wearers deserve better than having the lowest stock counts in the full size run. We’re the big dawgs of this game, and we allow puny little size 8ers to push us around in the market. It ends now.

Constantly disrespected with low stock levels and ridiculous upcharges, it’s never been more challenging to have a size 13 foot. It’s the first size to sell out, and many in-demand drops don’t even offer it to begin with. Back when Patta and Nike first released the Waves rendition of the Air Max 1, I had to go to SneakerCon Boston to track down a pair of Monarchs that were even remotely close to retail. Five years later, when Patta and Nike brought back the Waves, neither the Hyper Crimson nor the White colorways were offered in a 13 or EU size 47. Plus, no Nike release in the States. So, guess we can’t have those? Oh, what do you know, there are somehow size 13 Hyper Crimson Patta AM1 Waves on StockX available for a cool $839 – just a nearly SEVEN HUNDRED DOLLAR TAX.

The final straw for me was this morning when the Orioles edition of Nike’s City Connect series of Air Max 1s dropped and the size 13s were gone immediately with everything else available. None of you are even Orioles fans. The only Orioles fans outside of Baltimore are me and Elaine Benes, and she’s not even real. So, I know it wasn’t a matter of them truly “selling out” that fast, because other sizes would have been gone, too. They just didn’t make any size 13s. They produced all of their Orioles kicks, then said, “Oh wait, we forgot those gross size 13 people. We have to make a few so they can’t say we’re discriminating. Stitch together like four pairs and call it a day.” Or something like that.

Before you say it, this is not just about Air Max 1s with orange in the colorway. I see it everywhere in sneakers. Nigel Brick After Brick Jordan 4s in a size 8.5 are going for just over retail at $249. Size 13 is an extra hundred bucks. Size 13 Jellyfish cost more than a new Honda Civic. Last Orgy 2 Air Force 1 in the 2001 cut is going for less than $600 in a size 9. A size 13 just sold for nearly $1,900.

I get how supply and demand works, short kings. There are less size 13s available so the price is higher. But I’m asking why there are less? Why do we need so many size 5.5 hype sneakers? I propose we move everything under size 7 into children’s sizing, make them cheaper so the itty bitty committee doesn’t get upset, and add more allotment for size 13 and, dare I say, start making some 12.5 and 13.5. Everyone else gets to fine-tune their sizing with half sizes to adjust up or down depending on the fit… but not us. We have to painfully squeeze into a 12 or risk looking like Wemby in a 14.

You know who wore size 13? The GOAT of sneakers, Michael Jordan. Well, on one foot at least. He wore a left 13 and right 13.5. How many championship rings does the best player to wear size 11s have? I’ll take a team of size 13 players against anyone, period. We have D. Rose, we have both Splash Brothers, Steph Curry and Klay Thompson. Don’t want to go by basketball? Fine, let’s go by flag football. We got Rajon Rondo, too. Do the size 9s want to have a dance off? We got John Wall. Even one of the most legendary sneakerheads in history, PJ Tucker, rocks a size 13. Our roster is stacked.

At the end of the day, size 13 sneakerheads run the game, and yet somehow, we get the most disrespect when it comes to distribution. We have to be more strategic and cunning on the hunt for the best releases, because ours sell out the fastest every single time. We are the most dedicated because we have to spend the most to acquire the same collection as everyone else. We have paid the cost to be the boss, and now we’re organizing. The 13rotherhood is forming and we aren’t going to tolerate the mistreatment anymore. We’re not paying the premiums on secondary. All you tiny foot weirdos buying up the 13s just to resell them to people who actually wear them for 5X the price are going to be stuck with a closet full of shoes you couldn’t dream of filling out. Little ass boys.

No more asking for our size at a retail store and being told, “Sorry we only have an 11.5 but you can check online.”

No more fancy collaborators telling Nike, adidas, and other major sneaker brands they only want their co-branded products offered in a limited size range. Shout out Melitta Baumeister by the way for letting me cop a 14.5 in women’s sizing, you a real one MB.

No more ignoring the 12.5 and 13.5 crews, either. The 13rotherhood deserves to be able to slightly size up or down just like the rest of the sneaker community.

For far too long, The 13rotherhood has endured this mistreatment and stood strong, continuing to hold up this market while lesser sneakerheads with inferior footprints ran rampant and ruined the game. Now, we take it back. We bring the power back to the size of Jordan, from whence this entire thing originated in the first place.

We call on Jordan Brand to be the first to step forward and enact change. Make as many 13s as you do 10s or 11s. Watch them sell out. Repeat. The 13rotherhood has shown its dedication and we’re not going anywhere. Treat us with the respect we have earned and we will reward brands for it.

In the meantime, all of my 13rethren should download the Sole Retriever app, where you can track your favorite brands and silhouettes and get notified immediately when our beloved size 13 gets restocked.

Drew London

Drew oversees content at Sole Retriever and hates writing in the 3rd person soooo I'm going to stop. I've written for countless blogs and magazines, from Complex to XXL and everywhere in between. Spent a long time in LA, running content and working on branded collabs at The Hundreds. Now, I'm back home on the East Coast freezing my ass off. Email me at drew@soleretriever.com with scoops, story ideas, and size 13 heat.